Worthy
by grainipiot
Summary: Sworn to serve yet sometimes he shall be reminded that titles had nothing to do in a bedroom. Kinktober prompt for 'blindfolds' [Xin Xhao/Jarvan III, PWP, 15 years before canon]


« Xin, wait. »

« My lord ? »

Better take this slow, pause before the change couldn't be asked and made. Jarvan didn't make a single move to get out of the embrace, to prevent useless fear. No doubt the latter would take this personally, no matter how soft or harsh it could be.

Already minutes since they got into the royal bedroom, shy eagerness begging to be released and allowed. Only in privacy. This was something he learned since they even got to such intimate step. That Xin Zhao would patiently wait for the end of the day, seem so calm until the doors were closed, locking away their love for no one to see. Of course, it wouldn't be approved, by anyone at the court. Also because his now lover was the most cautious around, making sure they would never be found out. Maybe not just for his king but for his own peace of mind. Modesty.

Once he put everything between Jarvan and the rest of the world, himself included, then it left Xin Zhao free to love safely. Right then, it meant keeping his king in his arms, nuzzling his neck and giving as many pecks as he could over skin. Slightly urgent, glad to be there without a doubt. A day was quite long to wait, to have each other back and able to return the smallest kind of affection.

Armor pressed to him, strong hold around him, Jarvan let him do for a time, relishing this new initiative. _He's warming up_.

Sometimes he wondered if Xin Zhao was scared, to give in this relationship, to be there. Or afraid of the risk for them, to hurt his king, to show too much, to ask. One thing to remember about his seneschal was his sense of duty, almost blind loyalty and love. It could be sweet but also refrain him.

This was the beginning, coaxing him little by little to trust himself, be bolder, stop worrying uselessly. It would take time, Jarvan knew it well. Already by seeing how long it took them to realize then admit these feelings, the craving to be around beyond the mere duty of a soldier.

So this was going well for now. His lover dared by himself to hold him, initiate contact but only when he was certain to be accepted. _I would always accept_. But Xin Zhao needed time and he was patient. Let love blossom at its own rhythm. This so called privilege, for the importance the latter gave to anything about his king. To be allowed close, to touch him, to undress him, to make love to him. Most sacred act of worship, to his eyes yet Jarvan thought this to be excessive. If it was only in one way. He wished to give this back, make it as sweet as it was given to him.

This night, he would try. To see if Xin Zhao would allow himself to be loved in return.

Everything brought to this instant, when it was time to ask and follow another path.

« Tonight, allow me to serve. » Special choice of word, to indicate how much he longed to fully give back. Xin Zhao was so prompt to kneel for him, whatever he deemed good to treat him right but he feared he wouldn't allow this to be reciprocated.

Silent boundary, between king and seneschal. Yet he wished this gap to vanish. No titles in a bedroom, not between them, not during love.

As he half expected, his lover froze and even his expression betrayed the slight shock. It was time to be convincing.

« No, I am the one supposed to serve. I can't let you. » Determined indeed. As if questionned on the most basic rule. It was supposed to be this way, at least in hsi mind.

« But I want to. Let me take care of you, at least tonight. »

This seemed to leave Xin Zhao on an inner conflict. King Jarvan wanted something and he was refusing it right now. But he shouldn't. In any case he wouldn't glad with the outcome, whether disobeying or letting a self-rule to be broken.

Head shaking no, firmly. Yet it looked like his lover couldn't voice this. A bit cruel, Jarvan realised, to put him through a dilemma. _But we would both enjoy it. _He was sure about it.

Only issue was to convince the latter that he was allowed to lie down for once. Not to be in charge. As if even in the sheets he was on duty. No, not in the sense of lack of love but rather he would always put his king's needs before his. Question of priority.

« This isn't right. I have to. And I want to, my lord. »

« My name, Xin. This isn't the council or the court. »

« Jarvan. » This time said lower, suddenly averting his gaze to lean into his king.

Here, so easy. A mere name yet even such a small detail could get Xin Zhao like this.

« Is it so difficult to understand that I too can crave to satisfy you ? See you so pleased ? You always take good care of me yet you refuse to let me return it. »

« You make it sound as if it's normal to…to give equally. We're not equal, I am at your service. »

This embrace never stopped, sometimes loose, sometimes tight depending on the latest words. Both were stubborn, it was normal. Jarvan always praised such a trait but in this exact situation he could have some regrets. How to bring the latter to enjoy himself, even for a short time ?

« We are. Maybe not in titles outside this bedroom but here there is just you and me. No titles, no duty. Now, let me undress you. »

It was so clear how Xin Zhao wanted to argue, tell the contrary but at the same time he couldn't deny the honor to be on the same level. Yet Jarvan waited before starting. If they were to do it another way tonight, he wanted full consent from his lover. To know this was wanted as much. As love should always be.

Since the latter didn't move or said anything, standing there with his arms laced around his king, nothing could be done.

« Will you let me, love ? If you say yes, I will make love to you with as much care than you. If you say no, I won't hold it against you. I can't bring you to something you would hate. »

More silence. Only difference was the tightening in the embrace, till words were whispered to his ear as if scared of anyone else.

« I wouldn't hate it. I would always accept with gratitude anything from you but it's so difficult to be the one in need. My apologies. »

In these instants Jarvan wished he could see his face. Even as he said this. For now, he would wait. « No need to apologize, never. So, yes or no ? »

« Yes, please… »

As if wounded, weak only for an instant. He could understand this wasn't easy for Xin Zhao, to admit something as personal. Selfish. Anyway, he was glad. _Now I shall provide_. What a thrill, to be able to take care of his lover.

Acting on the urge, Jarvan parted so slightly, enough to trail a gentle hand over the latter's face, craddle his cheek. Indeed a soft blush gracing Xin Zhao's face, a real thing of beauty. Not so foreign, so many nights together he saw an even darker red flushing his cheeks in the blessed seconds of climax.

Could have lost himself in that wonder, enraptured but Jarvan was quick to return to reality, remember what he seeked. So he went for it, claiming the latter's lips as a distraction for his loud thoughts. Not too hungry but enough passion to crave more. Push back, again and again, to find reason and pull back, breath a little shorter. This was a nice look on Xin Zhao, enjoying the smallest attention.

_It's time to move_. So he did, starting to undress his lover. Still not very easy for him, he had yet to learn. Every time Xin Zhao prefered to take care of this himself, making quick work of it after cherishing his king as clothing was taken off. In any case, Jarvan did his best, pieces of armor taken off and put carefully away. Always serious with protocols.

« I could do this myself. » Not so loud, merely a statement left aloud.

« Indeed but don't you enjoy undressing me too ? I love to be the one revealing this gorgeous body. » Easy, unfair, he knew it but it was so sweet.

Xin Zhao averted his gaze once more, tense stance as he was only in his light clothes, then nothing.

Shaky exhale, before he answered.

« You don't have to say such things. I would comply in any case. »

_He's nervous. Or embarrassed_. It could be both or mostly the second option. The more he learned about Xin Zhao, like the fact that he never seeked a lot of attention. Standing there naked was probably unpleasant. _Fast, then_.

« Only the truth for my most trusted man. I am allowed to tell what I appreciate, no ? » A kiss given quickly, chaste then he let go, lightly pushing his lover toward the bed. « Lie down, dear. I won't have you stand for nothing. »

« But I should undress you. You did it for me, this would only be fair. »

_True indeed_. Such a speech about being on the same level, nonsense if he didn't let him do. This time yes, maybe another time he would completely take charge for the evening.

« Do as you wish. Then I shall take care of you. »

No need to tell him twice. Quickly Xin Zhao got to work, glad as he took off royal clothing with reverence. Always respectful, despite the increasing urge pressing them to act. Jarvan felt firm hands over him, through the barrier of fabric then coming in contact with skin as he was undressed. Nothing new on that part, the latter already had the habit for this. But he couldn't deny the seizing need within him, for this constant touch, focused attention and obvious love.

So not a real surprise to find himself craving for more, desire awaken. It was the point this evening, both were aware yet it took him to see Xin Zhao so flustered by his own consent to feel arousal getting stronger. Naked, to be seen, Jarvan wasn't one to shy away. Staying there, arms open to welcome his lover closer. Merely a short embrace before more but soft contact was always enjoyed.

Difficult to ignore this impressed glance, for earning such bodily reaction. As if the latter questionned his own appeal. _Is it so strange ?_ Impossible to deny Xin Zhao's unique beauty, at least for his own eye. Sculpted strenght, angles and battles marked over skin. _What not to like here ?_

Scars left to be seen and a few he recognized, for he was there when it happened. Received for him, for Demacia and his duty. Love could do so much and each of these marks filled Jarvan with a bittersweet feeling. How could he protect the man dedicated to die for him ? No time for this, it was a nice evening.

Kiss broken when hands wandered a little too far. Soft moan, whispered against lips and the next look exchanged was fueled by passion. Raw, begging to act on this. But he was the one in charge.

« Lie down, now. Please. »

Right as he sat in bed, he saw Xin Zhao notice a last detail, quick moves as he untied his hair. Inky like as it fell over his shoulders, and even more beautiful once he lied down in the sheets. For now this was going well. Though Jarvan could tell his lover wasn't so calm. This was unknown territory, to be loved first. Watching him come closer, a hint of desperation to have him back. Not a word.

Oh he loved that wide gaze, once he joined him, only to tower him. Such a change from everyday worship. Now Xin Zhao would be the target of passion, till all he could think of was love. Glad for this reaction he leaned down and kissed him fast and deep, making sure to catch his breath and attention.

Not agressive, rather ardent love and wandering hands again.

Till he realized the helpless moves, twitching weren't just arousal. Something else, another side. Jarvan parted, to look at him and indeed it was hinted.

« Are you scared ? » Soft tone, the most private he could find.

Quick no, followed by an exhale and deeper breath. Still, there was something in Xin Zhao's stance that wasn't so relaxed. Difficult to figure out, it was probably something personal and his lover wasn't so open on this. To let out any weakness. _What's wrong ?_

To soothe as he could, he lied on top of him, skin to skin and pressed kisses after kisses. Enjoying the warmth of another body under his fingertips, drawing patterns over skin. Then it seemed obvious. Maybe it could be true.

« This would be your first time on the receiving end ? » Not even searching eye contact, he doubted his lover would return it.

Suddenly still under him, hands that previous held him close now stopped. This was a yes. If Jarvan was wrong, he would be corrected as quick.

« You know this is alright. There is no shame for this and I promise I won't hurt you. »

More coaxing, cuddling with Xin Zhao till an answer was heard : « I…I'm not ashamed. I just fear that my lack of experience will make this not as good for you. My apologies. »

« You never need to apologize, even less right now. This is normal and I'll remain careful, to make it the best possible. »

Searching for the latter's gaze and he found it, barely daring to meet his. « I doubt you'd hurt me. I trust you, my lord, and you're free to use me. »

_No_. « This isn't how it works. I'm not using you, just like you didn't use me all these nights before. Making love is mutual, dear. And again, I have a name I'd like to hear many times tonight. »

So many reasons to blush, for the implicit, affection flooding the tone. Never rush, just make it slow and clear. They would enjoy it better once it was fully understood, in its meaning and intention.

Need. So obvious in Xin Zhao's expression. Heartwarming to see so much yet it reminded him the latter still had to come in term with his own desires. As much as he craved, aroused beyond imagination, he would first please his king. Not even sure he would do something for himself, if he deemed it too late, not the proper place.

Tonight Jarvan would take him bit by bit, take over his thoughts, give the love the latter didn't exactly felt worthy of.

Nothing came. Not a word. Just this sweet expression of silent desperation. A sight that made him ready to give all he could, kiss him again. Grateful, to have him as lover yet he still had to show this attention.

_What should I do now ?_

« Can I start ? » Maybe to break this frozen instant, gazing at each other. Almost convinced Xin Zhao wouldn't stand more.

Short breath, small nod as quick. And the latter turned his face away, on a side. Aching, to see him submissive. This was supposed to be good yet Xin Zhao looked like he braced himself for violence.

Staying there, mouth trailing the latter's jaw, he yearned to be accepted. Love was meant to be fully enjoyed, on the two parts. Why take this as punishment ? Fear was too clear.

On the opposite, his lover still held him with the same strenght, arms around Jarvan. Different signals, difficult to see through it.

« You don't seem to want this. Again, are you sure ? Xin ? You say this is alright yet you look so scared. Don't hate me, please. » A little too much conveyed, truthful. He couldn't bring himself to force him. Maybe this was too far of their comfort zone.

A hand brought to his own face, right after Jarvan spoke. As if to hide the burning red of his cheeks. « N-No, I want it. I want it so much but I can't look at you. Not now, not for… this. It's too much. »

Hidding from this world, from his king. Indeed it could be a little too transgressive for his lover to be served and not the one doing it. Too far from his habits, his discipline.

At the same time, Xin Zhao slightly jerked against him, needy move that betrayed his state. So it was true, he craved but despised himself for being the one taken care of.

« Maybe I have a solution. Would it help you if I took your sight away during this ? » Serious offer, he wanted to make it the best possible.

« Please. »

« Very well. I will be quick. »

Leaving the bed for a time, he stood in the bedroom and looked for anything that could be useful. Still, behind a soft noise came up and he turned curiously. To see the latter facing his direction, no longer hidding himself but rather a worried gaze. Rising then lying down, as if lost in his priorities. Confused. Or conflicted.

It still prompted Jarvan to move and find something. At last he did, a piece of deep blue fabric that he deemed soft enough to be used.

Returning to bed, he still saw that relieved look, concealed as quick. To be welcomed by eager hands, restless though anxious. Wandering lower, he did notice how aroused Xin Zhao was, no doubt he craved as much as him but couldn't hope for more yet because of this block.

The latter sat up properly, to be blindfolded. So Jarvan did, carefully. Fleeting thought, on how blue really suited his lover. Demacian colors sure were beautiful on him or maybe the opposite, he made it stunning. Secure knot, not too tight.

« Is this alright ? » Still asked to be sure, as he took the latter's sight.

« Yes. » A bit more composed than a few instants ago. Yet need ran low, his hard cock as proof.

« I will try my best to warn you before any new move. And so you know, I'll touch your face before a kiss. Tell me when it becomes too much. »

As example, he came closer and gently brushed Xin Zhao's cheek. The latter opened up as quick, rushing into the claim before he could even press this kiss. _Still eager_. This was good to see, that maybe a blindfold could make it easier for him.

It stretched in time, as he took his lover in his lap and the kiss went on. Contact found and relished, not so innocent anymore. And here came arousal, meddling in the embrace. Next move, Jarvan grabbed his cock and gave a few long strokes, seeking to please. Moans followed, his and Xin Zhao's, rocking into contact. New passion, making them seek early pleasure despite the plans for later.

To get carried awas would be unwise. He struggled a bit but reason was strong. Parting, he held his lover close and gave his love in small marks over flesh. A few more hushed gasps broke out, praising his attention. _We have to move_. Jarvan still craved to make love to him and they wouldn't go far if he was to come on the spot. So a bit of discipline.

« Love, I will get out of bed to search oil. Wait for me. » Whispered against skin, love spilling without an afterthought.

Still answered by a small groan of sadness, when Xin Zhao let him go. « Please, come back. »

« I won't be long. » Last kiss, very chaste and he stood again. A bit of a useless move, he should have thought about it last time he got out of bed.

While he was away, he could glance ans see his lover blindly looking for him. Paying attention to any noise, till he faced his direction. Even with the blindfold his face gave out a vulnerable emotion. Sprawled in bed like a gift, waiting in blushing impatience, hand held out for his king over the sheets.

« Gorgeous. I know you tend to doubt my words when it comes to your qualities but I can't stay quiet about it. I'm proud and glad to be blessed with your love. » Sweet like honey, as much easy to drown in and deadly. Yet it was true, he couldn't deny this fortune that graced his life. After the most perfect wife, the most perfect lover.

The reaction was fast, light twitching as if Xin Zhao was tempted to physically curl up and hide from praise. Yet he did nothing of it, merely turning his face to the opposite direction.

« Don't hide from me, dear. » He kept talking, sort of indicating his position in the room as he indeed found oil. Coming back to bed, by the latter side. Still welcomed though the stance was more shy now.

Open for him, legs splayed though he could sense this sort of nervosity. To soothe, he ran his hands on his lover's legs. Stroking his thigh and looking secretly for a pleasant area. Make it better. There was so much he could repeat, from Xin Zhao's multiple ways of worship.

Now, even if blidnfolded, he turned his face away. Left open, to be loved but not ready to acknowledge it.

« One last time, will you let me ? »

« Yes. » Short, quick. Maybe he didn't trust his voice not to betray his emotions.

_Then it shall be_. Hand slicked, Jarvan joined his level, supporting himself right above his aching need.

Starting slow, probbing this intimate area, smearing oil around his rim. Careful to any sound, move that could tell discomfort. This was also to be acknowledged before he went to it. Pressing to his entrance, till his finger went in without much resistance.

« Relax, it will feel better soon. » Not to doubt Xin Zhao but he prefered to take his time.

Already some light clenching around the digit, before he seemed to let go. Shaky breath above. Given his lover's opinion on this act tonight, he wasn't betting on loud reactions. It would be too much to ask.

It was time to get on his plan. Going lower, Jarvan teased lightly the latter's cock. Light touch, enough to be noticed while he went on the preparation. Twitching into contact, betraying impatience. And Xin Zhao was completely blind, wouldn't have seen him doing it. Yet he still gasped when that tongue licked its way up his shaft. No rest given, he returned to it and sucked on the tip, glad to be rewarded by such faint reactions.

Jarvan wanted to make him come undone, lose it little by little. When his lover would almost get used to the teasing, then he would go down on him and swallow. Make him desperate, clutching the sheets in this effort to stay quiet. Then it wasn't enough, he added a second finger inside, scissoring. Exploring this new territory, making him squirm on the royal bed.

Looking up for a time, he was met by indeed a nice sight. Far from peaceful, face turned furiously to a side. Almost trying to completely turn around, hide his inexperience and need.

All this reached another level when he hit that spot by accident, not even sure where to find it. Cry out, echoing in the room and the second he looked up, Xin Zhao had his hands over his mouth, clinging to control. _No…_ He wished to hear more, hear him lose himself in pleasure.

At that point he was sure the latter was ready for next step. But he enjoyed this, to cause pleasure. To have him so close, reduced to nothing merely with his mouth and hands. _I will make him come_. Make him find release first, contrary to all these nights where he made sure to be second. It was only fair. Maybe Xin Zhao would blame himself later but this was the point of the evening, exchanging 'roles', what he thought to be normal. Now he lost power and his king would be the one to serve.

Till he dared to speak up, at the brink of climax : « W-Wait ! Stop ! I'm too close, please, stop… »

Why would he ? This was exactly what Jarvan seeked. To be the one to give pleasure, witness his end. So it only spurred him to double his effort, take more. Relentless now, hand working his lover thoroughly. To be sure to finish him, he took him down his throat and heat spilled suddenly, short spasm while he struggled to keep up.

It didn't last too long, this was a comfort. As much as he loved to feel the latter's obvious pleasure, it was difficult to keep up. Pulling off his cock, some come still dripping off and staining his cheek. To breathe was the priority, after this first victory. Hand out, he rose and got a good look at Xin Zhao's.

Disheveled, tense, hands kept above his mouth for all this time and he seemed to stay stuck like this. Unable to move unless to whimper lowly, shaken.

Jarvan wiped clean his mouth while he kept this fond gaze on his lover. Unable to resist the urge to explore his open body. At first it made him jump slightly from his lethargy then he went limp in the sheets.

Hungry, he took away Xin Zhao's hands and gently brushed his face, begging silently for a kiss. Returned, though not in the same passion. His lover seemed both exhausted, shaken to his core and still hesitating to let out anything. Returned fast to face another direction, breaking the kiss.

Hand over his chest, Jarvan felt him breathe with some difficulty, trying hard to remain unaffected but he was just a man, slave to emotions and need.

Backlash, for letting go even for a time. Trembling, a lot. Enough to catch his attention.

« What's wrong, love ? It wasn't good enough ? » Worried.

Even more when Xin Zhao truly turned away, struggling under him to roll over, hide his face in the pillow. Could just see this happen, staying above his lover with increasing worry.

« Xin, tell me…Did I do something wrong ? Do you want to stop for now ? »

« No… I'm sorry, I can't. I should be the one tending to you, not the contrary. Forgive me… »

« Don't say that. Think about any other night, if I was the one saying this to you. Does it sound fair ? You wish to please as much as me yet you refuse to be loved. »

« This…this is different. » Half muffled into the pillow.

« So I'm worthy and you're not ? …You don't want my love ? » It was far deeper than that, he was aware. But he had to get Xin Zhao to understand how unfair it was for them, not to be on the same level. A double standard. « Face me, even if you won't see me. »

Such struggle, it was clear in the latter's tense position. Clutching his fist, conflicted. But in the end he still returned to their embrace, lying back and asking his king closer.

« I want it. This is why I live for, you, this love, everything. But it feels so much like betraying my purpose… »

« Then let me prove my love, celebrate it. I know it will take time for you to get used to receive but I will be patient. »

Thumb stroking his cheek, he came down to kiss him again. Languid, hoping to show his dedication to slowness. Show his lover he understood the struggle and he would wait for him.

Against him, Xin Zhao let him in, eager tongue pressing back. Little by little he recovered from his first release, not even minding the taste. Honesty could do so much for them, Jarvan led him into this.

Hands lingered on his face, careful. Maybe trying to get his attention, feel him near in this lack of sight. He parted anyway, laying a gentle gaze on his lover. The blindfold couldn't hide that fierce blush anymore. Still, Xin Zhao kept his hands right there.

« Thank you. I'm equally grateful for your patience. I also know you will complain for an hour if I apologize once more so I won't. » Breath let out, like a weigh lifted. If that was possible, he seemed to relax. « Still, you haven't come yet. Let me help you. »

_Always the duty_. Now wasn't the time for a long talk, still got plenty of nice things to share. And his lover wasn't wrong, he craved relief and the latest intercourse only fueled the fire.

« You know tonight I'm the one in charge. But worry not, we shall find release together. Would still let me take you ? »

Short pause, before the latter answered, gaze averted for a time : « I would let you do anything. Yes please, I want to have this with you. »

Proper consent. Great step taken, for all it meant. No doubt Xin Zhao was greatly ashamed of himself for making a personal choice but it had to be worked on.

And now came the pang of need, realizing he was indeed going to make love to him in a way they never shared before. _His first_.

« Alright, love. I'll do my best to be gentle. »

In last attempt, the latter pulled him for a quick kiss, merely a press of lips before he let him go.

Trying to control the urge, Jarvan rose and sat back, slicking his cock. Stroking himself quickly but already he could tell he wouldn't last. After all, he just got to witness such beautiful end.

Afterthought, sudden. _Is it enough ?_ He wasn't sure if Xin Zhao was able to take him so soon but a few minutes already went by since then.

« Just, dear, are you ready or do you want me to wait a bit more ? »

This wasn't the best part for his lover, blindly trying to reach for him since contact was reduced. When called, he stilled and seemed to think.

« I think it's fine. I will tell you if it hurts. »

By mere need to be sure, Jarvan pressed two fingers back to his rim, easily slipping inside. No resistance opposed, plenty relaxed. A faint moan still bubbled up, for the stimulation.

« A-Alright. Feels good… »

Now he could go. No risk to hurt him and anyway he would never stop watching over till the end. _Please_. His blood boiled to allowed. So close, merely a few moves then he would be free. With shaky moves Jarvan returned on top of the latter, so they could still hold each other when it became too much. A small request answered, now Xin Zhao embraced him as to never let go. Making sure he was here.

A bit of positionning then he pushed inside. Slowly, careful but from the start the pressure punched him. Face resting to the latter's shoulder, he inched gradually, reaching deeper. The grasp on him grew strong as well, clinging to him as he was filled. Even heard a broken noise when he was fully sheathed.

« Is it…Is it good ? » Breathless, sucked by tight warmth and so difficult to think in this exact position.

_I won't last…_ A bit unfair for them, he wanted to give so much but here he was halfway to orgasm and so little control left. The least he coud hope was to get his lover off another time before he came. So without waiting he stroked his cock, firm grasp made slick by the previous release.

If before Xin Zhao was barely recovering from the start, now he completely lost it, back arching into contact, off the mattress. Another cry, at the limit of pain.

It made Jarvan stop.

« Too much… ? »

« N—No ! Please don't stop…I-I need… » Overwhelmed so fast, voice breaking.

Foreign sound to his ear, such desperation. He felt so happy to be allowed to see him right now, in his arms, shaking. Without even thinking, Jarvan rutted inside, seeking their relief like water to its source. He wanted this, to see Xin Zhao utterly loved and satisfied.

« Jarvan… »

The tone made him look up. Fabric got darker, damp. Indeed it was tears in his voice that urged him to check. _Oh…_ Many details to engrave, sobs breaking out, hurried pleas for more, the slap of skin against skin. Fast, faster. He was losing the rhythm, merely able to fist the latter's cock, bring him closer possible. It turned almost violent, for the rough need in every move.

« Love…you…thank you…for letting me… » Almost babbled, sense of reality losing grip.

Then he reached that spot again and the latter really shouted from this, coming hard between them. Cry lasting till it broke in more sobs, head resting to Jarvan's neck. The embrace was almost too strong, never letting go, even as he rocked them to his end.

He wouldn't last beyond the aftershock, clenching around him. Glad to be the second, he gave everything and lost control. So this was how it felt, to be held dearly through love, as he brought the latter to climax. It was definitely worth it.

Riding the feeling till it ran out, last few thrusts in tender heat before he pulled out, a bit of reason not to cause harm. It still earned him a whimper, registered as he collapsed by Xin Zhao's side. Not even sure if he did good. In this foggy time, he ran his hand over the latter and found the mess made, warm release. Still made him smile, to have caused this.

Now maybe they could hope to breathe correctly. Lying down, limbs tangled and not even fully cuddling. After bliss, it was so hard just to move. Jarvan still made an effort at going up, looking for his lover's lips.

Sweet kiss, answered lazily but still alive. A bit of drool, for the lack of care. Xin Zhao turned to snuggle properly. And not once it crossed their minds to take off the blindfold.

Till Jarvan realized, a bit too hazy for this.

« … Can I take it off ? »

Or it was fine, or his lover would prefer to keep it till possibly the end of the night. He wanted to ask, see if the mood was fine or not. Still sensitive.

The answer didn't directly come. Instead, Xin Zhao took it off himself. Slowly blinking to get used to the dim light then it turned soft as it settled on him. So much love yet a hint of self-disapproval. This wouldn't be over but such a good step was taken.

« It's alright. I loved each second of it. And you dear ? Was it good ? » Taking him in his arms, enjoying contact.

« I…This was amazing. Thank you so much. »

Left aloud yet he could tell there was a silent part. He wouldn't tell his fears now. It was far too sweet.

« I am glad to hear that. Next time you will be free to have me as you wish but understand that this matter isn't over. You deserve as much as you give me. »

Genuine gaze, both worried and relieved. A long path to come, so there was no guilt in the end. But for now it was time to sleep, letting exhaustion lead them.


End file.
